Ever had a performance review at work? In a recent article in the Wall Street Journal (2015), a study found that couples who had regular “marriage reviews” also had healthier marriages! The couples who went through the review saw significant improvement in relationship happiness, closeness, and decrease in depression.
Like the review at work has as its goal better performance for the organization, start with the positive. When seeing your therapist for the two-session marriage review, six objectives were important: (1) Address behavior, not the person. (2) Explain your conclusions. (3) Listen. (4) Be consistent. (4) Allow the other person to respond and provide input. (5) Be clear about what you would like to change. (6) Show that you are aware of the other person’s perspective.
Why not consider it? You may find that you’ll give yourself a raise!